Not an engagement photo, but still nice. At the aquarium

Got to have LSU gear

And she started modeling

Again with the look

 

Here are the American Engagement photos.

We went to America for just under three weeks.  She had to meet my family before we announced our plans.

All went perfectly well and, a surprise to me, plans began to be made.

I guess that is expected of me.  I’m expected to have a reaction like ”oh, we have to do that now?”  And one day we had to take these photos for cards or something or something.

I like them though.

That’s all.  Enjoy.

The lady and I

I’d be smiling more if I wasn’t in extreme discomfort from the way I had to sit…

Receiving blessings

Me, Sorphorn, Host Niece, Host Mom and Host Dad after the ceremony

You heard the story, now view the pictures…well…four pictures out of 50000.

The first part of the ceremony was just me.  As you can see, I wore a traditional Khmer shirt.  That wasn’t the plan.  They said I would just wear professional clothes.  I got a nice shirt made (the white one) for the ceremony.  Minutes before it started, they told me to put it on. Eventually, (thankfully, because I had no idea what was going on) Sorphorn joined me.  This is only the second (SECOND!) time I have ever seen her with makeup on.  Truth is, she does not need it so why wear it?  I prefer her without it, but she still looks gorgeous all the same.  I think the third time might actually be our wedding night.

After some traditional words are spoken, I presented gifts (that were prepared for me) to Sorphorn’s parents and an aunt.  It was a sign of their acceptance of me.  Then Sorphorn came, we exchanged gifts and then it was announced to the ancestors of our intentions.  Or the other way around.  Lastly, we were given blessings from friends and family.  This is shown by giving a gift (optional and usually in the form of money (though, some if it is for show)) and tying red string (most common sign of blessing here) around one of our (Sorphorn and I’s) wrists.  Both of us are still wearing a small part of our blessings.  (You can see clearly in the last picture the bundle on her wrist.  We took a few of the strings and braided them to make small bracelets.)

The last picture, in which I look stunning, is after the ceremony with my host family.

These are the Khmer engagement photos (not wedding photos, that is an entirely different ball park…and we will have to take those photos now…).  Next up, our simply beautiful American engagement photos.

Yes, I am engaged to a HCN (host country national).  I don’t really see it that way though, that I’m marrying a foreigner.  Doesn’t really feel that way.  It is hard to explain, but it just feels normal without any extra circumstances.

Wait…I’ll be back.  I’m going to watch ‘How I Met Your Mother.’

I’m back.  Good show.

Sorphorn (Sophie to those back home) and I started dating in early September.  It was a little rocky at first and that was almost entirely due to her being unsure whether I was a good guy and all that.  Sometime just before October, it all clicked together and it has been amazing since.

Now we are engaged (both Khmer and American engaged).  There wasn’t really a proposal.  Not a true, down on one knee proposal.  One night we talked about our future and what we wanted out of the relationship and it kind of came out as a mutual want.  We both wanted to stay together.  For a while, we were unofficially engaged.  We knew what we wanted and we knew it would happen, but it wasn’t official yet.

I knew for a long time that she was ‘the one.’  However, it was important for me that she meet my family (in person) before we announced anything.  We planned the trip to America (which was amazing) and waited from there.  It just so happened that something with this and something with a fortune-teller or something (I don’t totally understand it), but March 17th worked out to be ‘our day.’  The perfect day for us to have our Khmer engagement ceremony to ensure a long and happy life together…or something like that.

Problem was that we still had two weeks before America.  It had to remain a secret.  The more people who knew the more likely it would end up on Facebook.  The ceremony was great though I was lost half the time.  From March 17th on, we went from unofficially engaged to officially engaged.  Then we left for America and met my family.

I could see how well they liked each other and the day after my sister whispered that she wanted Sorphorn to be her sister-in-law, I told them we were engaged.  It kind of went like, “So, the BBQ on Sunday should be a special party…because we are engaged.”

Still, no down on one knee with a ring.  That’ll come after the end of service.

For us, it has been a huge weight lifted off our shoulders.  I had a lot of questions about what we would do once my service was over and it was difficult to lie.  Now, we can be open and happy about our relationship.

Our plans are to return to America.  Hopefully before October, but we will see.

Everyone has been incredibly supportive of our decision and of our relationship.

I do have photos, but I’m also lazy.

Still, we want to thank everyone for the support and overall joyful reaction.  We are very happy.

And I write a lot in the passive voice…

By the time you are reading this, we are already on the plane on the way to America.

Yes, Sorphorn, my girlfriend, is coming with me to visit my family and friends.  We are both very happy and excited about this.

I guess before we get there, I should introduce her to everyone.

I met her in late July when I went to back to visit my training village.  I was wearing dirty biking clothes, she looked nice (with an awesome snoopy shirt).  Naturally, she had to talk to me first.  First thing she said?  ”I hope this isn’t rude, but can I ask you something?”  ’Umm…sure.’ “Is your family Venezuelan? I mean did they come from there?”  I had to laugh.  Mainly because of the specificity of nationality she chose.  ’No, my family was from Sicily.’ And we talked for a long time after that.  I got her number.  (or…I got her numba!)  A couple of months later (September) we started dating. (I mean…we talked often between July and September…)

Dating is not typical with young Cambodians, though that is starting to change.  She was a little weary of me at first.  Was I a good guy?  (I am) Would I be good to her?  (I am) Was I a typical scumbag like many of the foreign men here?  Luckily, I’m not.  Over the months we have grown closer together.  I’ve met her family (they like me…I think…) and visited them several times over the months.  Now, she will meet mine.

Who is she?  Well, she is smart and hardworking for one (or two…).  She was in the top class throughout high school and finished university with a GPA well over 3.0.  On top of that, and the scholarship she received to attend university, she worked her way through university, not taking assistance from her family.  She has some of the highest level English I’ve found in a Khmer person.

She is truly one of the nicest people you will meet and so easy to get along with.  It is not hard at all to see why I fell for her.

She is gorgeous.  However, Cambodia says she is not.  It annoys the crap out of me, but she does not let it bother her too much.  She is happy with herself.  While many people here are worried about whitening their skin, she is worried about the chemicals in those products.  She isn’t worried that the sun will make her darker, just that the sun will damage her skin.  While some are trying to get the best phone or moto, she thinking about what she could do to help more people.

She’s not content with “that’s how it is” most of the time and therefore, won’t let me get away with some things.

I do love this one.

And…well..that’s all for now.  You’ll have to learn more for yourself.  We will see everyone in about 24 hours.

Here’s one more picture that I particularly like…

The worst part about going on vacation is the last week before you leave.

Last April’s trip, it was the two weeks prior.  I was just so excited to leave, but I had nothing to do at site.  It felt like a long time.  I know it was only two weeks but…

My school had exams three weeks before I left last year.  I figured I would be able to teach the last two and it would go by quickly.  However, the students did not come.  My school was officially unofficially closed for the break.

I was prepared for it this year.  Most exams were in February this year, but grade 12′s were last week.  I moved my departure date up a week this year (from the previous year) and planned a short trip during exams.  With that, the penultimate week (the trip down south for pepper) would go by quickly (because there is delicious food and time zooms when there is good food) and the FINAL week before we leave, I would be so busy I wouldn’t even realize it passed.  The trip did go by quickly, but this week is not.

I had two long reports, a messy room, a lot of side jobs and a lot of packing to do.  I wrote a list!  A to-do list!  How was I to know that I would finish everything in just a couple of days?  Now the days are crawling.  I finished all my work.  My room, always a mess no matter where I am, is clean.  I will mop the floors tomorrow and that is it.  I thought I’d have to scramble on Thursday to finish everything.

I’m not done packing.  Not really.  Once I mop my floor, I will take a stab at packing, or at least most it.  So many souvenirs and so many clothes to dump.  I need to get it right.  Like hell I am going to wash any clothes a week before WASHING MACHINE.  Half are still clean and I’m living in the dirty ones for now until I leave site.  When we arrive, I’ll likely only have a couple of clean outfits.  I’m OK with that.

Here’s to a seemingly speedier week.

Except it’s not.

I’m getting a lot done today in my hot, stuffy room.

The really important things are done.  All that is left is to clean and pack..and set my fantasy teams for the first few days…

Then “hello, America.”

I just wanted another post before the end of the month.

Wait for a special post at 11:30 am (America) on the 1st.

I wrote this post a while ago but never got around to posting it.  After a successful end to my last big project, I felt it was time.

Originally titled, “Here’s What You Don’t Understand…”

*****

I was granted the privilege to live in another nation for two years.  That is not to say I want to leave America (more importantly, Louisiana).  Not at all.  I completely love my state.  I am from Louisiana and I will proudly say that for the rest of my life.  Make it my epitaph, “I am from Louisiana.”  The outline of the state is tattooed on my chest.  I love my state.  Yes, it has its problems, many of them.  Sometimes these problems can be embarrassing, but I know what they are and I want to help fix them.  When I say I was ‘granted the privilege,’ I don’t mean I was happy to get out of there.  I mean I was able to take part in something that so few have.

I joined the Peace Corps.  It has been difficult.  From weekly intestinal problems to lazy students, it has often been a tough time.  The idea for PC is to work ourselves out of a job.  Think of it as an organization that would love to not have to exist.  If the world is void of social, ecological, educational and other adjective issues, what is the need for a development organization?  Working from a base or the ground up through resource development is the best way to accomplish the goal. (Side note: PC does not actually hold the view to ‘destroy’ or ‘cease to exist,’…I’m just paraphrasing ‘work yourself out of a job.)  It is also the most difficult and slowest way.

PC Cambodia is finishing its sixth year.  What have we done?  I hate that damn question.  Was it worth it?  I hate that question more.  Am I, one person, going to influence 500 kids in a small village?  Are these kids so inspired that they learned English over night and now are off to university?  Are 500 families now financially secure because 500 students finished university the next day and now have excellent jobs?  That is what I hear with the question ‘was it worth it.’  Did I completely change everyone’s life in my short time here?  HA!  I stink at sports.  I’m not a genius.  I’m incredibly good-looking.  I don’t have any special talents.  I see what is real and I’m OK with it.

You have to look beyond the work you did and didn’t do.  There are a few families here that legitimately and genuinely care for and love me.  I have 50+ government issued friends (and credit for that clever term goes to one of them) who I will never forget.  Only they understand what it was like.  I met someone special.  Someone I love absolutely.  I am connected to this place no matter what.  There.  I made it ‘worth it.’

Let’s look at what I did or didn’t do.  I taught (am teaching) English.  Over two years, even after just a few short months, I can tell some students have improved in reading and speaking English.  In two years, the teacher’s have improved.  Not enough, but they’ve improved.  I didn’t have a great club on this topic or that.  I tried but it didn’t work out (but the newest one might).  I did continue another PCV’s project.  I was scared shitless that it would fail or I wouldn’t receive funding, but I did.  Maybe, just maybe, one kid will take what he or she learned from their PCV, use that confidence they gained from writing or winning and do…something.  Even if it is as simple as the kid not shitting their pants when they have to write or speak English, I will be happy.

I didn’t build a basketball court.  Damn it, though, I had it.  I had it!  You know what happened?  ”This is too small for us.  We like to build big buildings.”  Yeah, I was livid.  I almost lost (emotional) control in front of the school director.  What could I do though?  It doesn’t change anything.  I did it.  I got the court and I would’ve watched with pride when students played on it for the first time.  I didn’t fail, they failed me.  Why wouldn’t it still be worth it?

I made it worth it for me.

It will be worth it for Cambodia.  I did not save the world nor will any other individual.  Give us several more groups.  Let me come back to Cambodia after 2, 3 or more PCVs have worked at the same school as me.  I will then show you the result of nearly a decade of work done in this small village.  I will tell you how it was when I first arrived and you will see the improvement that has occurred.

I will never regret serving with the Peace Corps.  I have and will miss weddings in America.  I miss my nephews growing up.  I miss my family and friends.  I miss my dogs.  I miss my dog…

I still wouldn’t change it.

*****

That’s all I had.  I wrote it right after I found out my lovely pup, Rooney, had died.  It happened when I am so close to visiting home again.  It is less than two weeks now before our visit and I can’t wait to see my Murphy.

I will post again at the end of the month with a special introduction post.

That is the show I currently want to watch.  Happy Days.

Nearly two weeks ago, my training host father called me.  Host sister was getting married and I was invited.  I was happy to go back to the training village and see everyone again.  I miss that place.  It has been 6 months since my last visit.

Sorphorn came with me to the wedding.

Here we are on our way out…

Yeah… I look good.

We visited a few people first then got ready.  We went with a few other PCVs, so we had a fun group.

That kid in the front is wild.

Unfortunately, it was Friday.  No meat again.  I survived though.  The food was really good and there was plenty for me to eat.

Here is Sorphorn once the food was finished.

She told me to delete it. I said no.

My host father was running around schmoozing with guest.  Every time he would pass our table, he would yell out “goan kynom sa-at.”  My kid is beautiful.  I think he was happy I came.

Yes, I am wearing sneakers. And yes, I do have a stain on my shirt.

I finally saw the host cousin.  I haven’t seen him since I left in 2011.  He is a good kid.

And my hair is messy.

The wedding and experience were great.  I had a lot of fun.  I was really tired from all the traveling, so Saturday was just a day to relax.  Sorphorn and I went out to eat at one of our favorite places.  What we ate is called ‘cow climbed the mountain.’  You cook it right at the table.  It is cheap and delicious.

mmm

This place doesn’t have the ‘mountain.’  Just a flat-iron.  The mountain is nice, but I think I prefer this way.

After doing very little Saturday, we went to my village on Sunday and Sorphorn met my host family.  They technically already met, but they did not fully understand that we are dating.  Dating is not a common thing to do here.

She is back with her family and my students have exams this week.  So I have nothing to do for the next few days.  Thursday, I will return to the capital for a special party.  I will talk more about that come Friday.  Let’s just say that I shined my dress shoes and found my tie.

Ash Wednesday.

It is not often that I post so frequently, but Ash Wednesday started off the Lenten season the right way.

No meat…what to eat?  I talked to Sorphorn and came up with fried vegetables.  I was all for that, but I had a different thought as I walked up to the market.  Fried rice.  I do love my fried rice.

After class, I told the host family what was going on.  Sorphorn coached me the night before on the vocabulary and grammar so I was ready.  I explained the next month and  half and what I wanted for that day.  So we went to the market and I bought a bell pepper, a carrot, cauliflower, rice and other stuff.

I was taught the proper rice frying technique this past Sunday.  I succeeded.  Look at this.

I made this.

It was good and filled me up.

Remember my other goal?  Yeah, not at site.  It seems I won’t be doing that, at least not at site.

Happy Mardi Gras to all!

Mardi Gras here means that Ash Wednesday is tomorrow.  Ash Wednesday means Lent.  Lent means no coke for me.  Coke means all carbonated beverages and sodas.  I’m from the south, people.

It’ll be tough like it always is, but at least this time Lent ends before I visit home.  The 36 hours of no meat/coke traveling last year was harsh.  I had to skip chicken at Popeye’s… At Popeye’s!  Not this year.

I’m going to try to start running each day too.  It is less likely I will complete this task, but I will shoot for at least 4 days a week.

My weight may change again.  That is good news for my mom and sister because then they get to force me to go clothes shopping.  I think I have already down another size because all of my shorts/jeans/pants (including my tailored pants) are slightly too big… And I’m on the last hole of my new belt.

In PC news, my project (that I took over for a PCV after he finished his service) has been fully funded.  In one month, people will gather in the capital to judge creative writing essays.  I’m happy to have gotten funding so early so I won’t have too much stress.  With nearly 20 PCVs participating, we may have up to 450 students writing… optimistically…

That’s all.  I hope to update this blog each week during Lent with my progress, but like running…that’s a maybe…